Talking to oneself alone v. talking to oneself in the presence of others.
Talking extensively to one’s pet v. listening extensively to one’s pet.
“And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger” v. “…Mary and Joseph and the baby lying in a manger.”
Herod Agrippa getting struck down by an angel of the Lord, breathing his last and, then getting eaten by words v. the sequence in which it went down: struck down by angel, eaten by worms, then dies. Another creative he-had-it-coming episode.
“Empty Nest Syndrome” v. “Awaited Rest Syndrome”
“I literally [insert past-tense verb]” v. “I metaphorically [insert same verb]”, especially when using verbs such as died, gagged, disappeared, or sucked. Keep in mind, if you intend to speak metaphorically, not only should you omit “literally,” but you needn’t announce “metaphorically” either. Metaphorically cool, right?
Coffee is a wonderful way to wake up in the morning. Unless “Coffee” is your Labrador retriever.
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